Crying

So, apparently Greg cries a lot.

I know what you all are thinking: "What a wuss! I can't believe Greg cries. Maybe we shouldn't be friends anymore." Don't listen to these people Greg. After all, you are in good company.

Jack Bauer cried at the end of Season 3 of 24. I couldn't find a link for this one.
Emmitt Smith cried during his Hall of Fame induction speech. Many others have done the same, like Brett Favre.
Tim Tebow cried after the Florida Gators lost to Alabama last season.
I don't know how you feel about Glen Beck, but he sure cries a lot.
Dan Rather cries at the end of this segment with Dave Letterman.
Terrell Owens had a memorable crying moment.
In one of the most awkward moments I have ever seen on TV, Kanye West cried on Leno.
President George H.W. Bush cried more than a lot of others.
Who can forget about the "It's Still Real to Me Dammit" guy?
Also, the Bible tells us that "Jesus wept." I'm having trouble finding video for this one.

That's right, Greg finds himself in a category populated by Jack Bauer, Emmitt Smith, and Jesus. It's time for men to ask themselves whether it's truly unmanly to cry. I think the masculinity standard is more complex these days. However, one thing remains certain: there's no crying in sports, especially baseball. Emmitt Smith, Brett Favre, and Tim Tebow clarify that this standard is limited to the playing field. Once the game is over, apparently the sprinklers can come on. Aside from crying during a game, the most unmanly thing to cry about is probably physical pain. This seems counterintuitive, but I think it's true. It's almost a Man Law that when you are in physical pain you fight back tears as hard as you possibly can. To be sure, there is a threshold beyond which it is okay to cry -- somewhere between high ankle sprain and major broken bone (nothing below the ankles or wrists). And finally, there is the crying Greg talked about. This kind of crying is brought on by being moved emotionally. As shown by the examples above, I think this kind of crying is becoming more and more acceptable. It's almost as if you publicly proclaim: "I am such a man that I don't care if I'm moved to tears by my emotions. Nothing you think will affect my manliness." Greg was headed straight down this path.

Was headed straight down this path. And then two words changed everything: "tender heart." Maybe he actually meant: "I have embraced the tender animal heart I have been eating with my bare hands." Now that's manly. Or maybe it was a Lionel Richie reference, which has a certain element of romantic smoothness. Maybe Greg was trying to tell us that he is experiencing early symptoms of congenital heart failure. This is a serious condition that many men suffer from and is certainly not unmanly to have. If that's the case, we obviously wish him the best and will keep him in our prayers.

But if "tender heart" really means what it sounds like it means? Well, that's just plain unmanly.