My Parents

So, apparently Greg thinks his parents aren't very affectionate. Oh if he could only see what happens when the lights go out. Shut the door. Make sure Greg's in bed. Where's Robert? Meh, who cares. A little reality television in the background. Maybe an argument about who's going to get voted off Dancing with the Stars. But only so they can make up afterwards. Oh, baby. Cue the Marvin Gaye. You know which one.

Unfortunately, the Brinck's aforementioned intimate practices have spun out of control. Greg mentioned that Suze is off on business. She told Greg she's on a "work trip." However, Response investigators confirmed that Suze is not, in fact, on a business trip this week. Suze is currently receiving treatment at Pine Grove Behavioral Health & Addiction Services in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. Initial reports are that she's in the same counseling groups as Tiger Woods. Unlike Tiger Woods, however, Suze and Larry are 100% monogamous. They remain each other's muse and flame. Indeed, recent police reports stem from the couple's "overly affectionate"  behavior in airplane bathrooms, public buses, movie theaters, and Cheddar's. They simply needed some difficult time apart to learn to control their salacious affections. 

All of this might be "awkward" for Greg, but the 31 years of Suze on, er, and Larry is definitely not a hoax.